Monthly Archives: September 2014

Wine For Normal Guys Vol 1 A.K.A “No doobt aboot it, keepin’ it Canadian, eh?”

50th Parallel Estate Pinot Noir 2012 Canada-$35

IMAG0275I have a personal rule when it comes to wine, I call it the “1525 rule.” Meaning I try to keep my wine in that price range. I’m a firm believer that you shouldn’t have to spend more than $25 to get good wine. On the other hand, when you spend anything south of $15 you truly are getting what you pay for. Same goes for any wine you buy with a jug handle, comes in quantities of 5 litres or more, or uses the phrase “wine style product” on the label.

I kind of broke my own rule on this one. I was on vacation in wine country, on a wine tour, caught up in the atmosphere and scenery and I think that influenced my purchase. Whilst I do loves me a good subtle delicate Pinot Noir now and then, there are things about Pinot Noir I dont like. One, price tag. Pinot Noirs are on average pricey due to the delicate nature of the grape. Two, theres a point of being subtle and theres a point where you’re so subtle you just gave me some alcoholic grape juice. Enough of my ranting lets get to the tasting notes for the normal guy.

Nose-(AKA How’s this bad boy smell?)- Got a decent whiff of dark cherry right off the bat, vanilla and some kind of spice but I couldn’t quite name it.

When I was in high school a common comment on my reports cards was “Mitch, has lots of potential that could be utilized and channelled for success if only he applied himself. However, he seems quite content to be a B minus student and put in just what’s required.” That’s kind of how I felt about this wine.

The flavour was flat as hell, there was almost no body to it. And it might just be me, but wine shouldn’t be ‘tangy’. This wine was just too dang young for my liking. I forgave the wine a little more once our BBQ steak dinner was with it, the food seemed to tame the wines flaw but not enough for me to say I liked the wine. Fuck it, I’ll say it. This was downright  over priced $35 grape shit in a bottle.

Screw It Pinot Grigio-Canada $12

IMAG0277A budget blend for a cheap ass price and it was actually pretty decent. Would work well with most foods, or as standalone drinking vino. You get a lot of citrus and herb at first whiff. Mild body, crisp finish, easily drinkable. A good wine to start the night with before moving onto other wines.

This would be perfect for dudes who got a ladyfriend coming over and need some booze to tip the getting lucky scales in their favour. If anyone actually gets lucky due to my half assed review, I better damn well get a thank you card.

-Mitch

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Mitch Returns: The Mitchening.

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Like a punchy aging boxer with financial troubles Mitch has come out of blogging retirement. Why now, you ask? The people of Earth need me. Like Jesus did after his final performance, it was time to let the blog rise from the dead. Actually, there really is no good reason other than I had an itch to write that needed to be scratched.

There’s going to be some changes to the format of the blog. First, the name of the blog. Over time the old title “Mitch Being Honest” just grew old and tiresome. I tried a few new titles on for size but none I was happy with. Then, I figured if the blog is about all things Mitch why not just call it “Mitch.” Simple, clean, easy to spell and remember. If one name is good enough for Cher, then God damn it, it’s good enough for me.

Over the next few weeks there will be some cosmetic changes to the site but frankly I hate dealing with crap like that so bear with me, it could take months before you actually see these changes.

The blog will still be mainly about all things Mitch and whatever the hell else I feel like writing about. My romantic relationship will still be off limits for two reasons. 1. That relationship is only between me and my lady and should remain that way. 2. I’ve written about dating and relationships to death and I am bored with writing about those topics.

Coming soon! If there’s one thing I love, it’s wine and last weekend after a few bottles I was ranting to the GF how I hate pretentious wine reviews like this:

An intense red, showing concentrated flavors of dark plum, kirsch, dried beef and baker’s chocolate flanked by sublime notes of tobacco leaf and ginger. The powerful finish is filled with sanguine details for it’s low $125 price. Only 5000 bottles made. Best paired with smoked venison with a light walnut glaze, served with a understated caviar pate…”

Let’s face it, as a normal dude who has fully embraced his bachelorhood I am never going to eat that kind of food, let alone ever cook food like that at home. I’m more apt to make some Manwich sloppy joes with a side of canned beans than haute cuisine.

I’ve been drinking wine for years, managed a wine boutique, and have taken numerous tasting courses. At best, I can pick out three to four flavours, tops, and two scents maybe on a good day if I was downwind and my allergies weren’t bugging me.

Not to mention I have never smelled half the bullshit adjectives they mention in pretentious wine reviews. Kirsch? villagepeople-branson's best reservationsWhat the hell is kirsch? I don’t know what kirsch is but I’m pretty fucking sure I’ve never smelt that. Dried beef? I don’t care what dried beef smells like. I don’t want to know nor do I want to smell anything in my wine that sounds like the title of a lesser known innuendo laced Village People song.

As well, a $125 dollar bottle of wine is out of my pay grade so a review like this is as useful as my arts degree. So I came up with a solution. Wine reviews for normal people, who drink normal wine, with a normal price range of $10-$25ish. Simple, no bullshit wine reviews. As an added bonus I now have a rational, viable explanation for my weekend alcohol abuse AKA “blog research.”

So keep an eye out for that feature coming soon…maybe Sunday… if I’m not too hungover.

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